TheTop10Everything.com

We all love to hate him, perpetrator of the Windows travesty and all round rich and irritating guy. But would I, given a chance, turn my disdain to adoration? Here are the 10 best reasons I can figure out for marrying him...

1. I've heard it on numerous occasions that once people get married, they stop having sex. Which would pretty much kill any possibility, however slight it might be in the first place, that I would EVER have sex with Bill Gates.
2. Think of the names our children could have! Rusty, Pearly, Wooden... If they're going to be psychologically scarred from having Bill Gates as their dad, AND they have enough money to afford the therapy, the why not?
3. I would get to meet heaps of interesting people in my every day life, such as Steve Ballmer. We could have dinner, and I could find out if he really is related to monkeys, if he sweats that much all the time, which evangelical church he belongs to, and whether or not he has some kind of tourettes syndrome that explains his "developers, developers, developers" speech.
4. I could do SO MUCH WORSE. No, really, think about it. George Bush, anyone?
5. Even though I will have complete access to all kinds of beauty therapies and products with Bill's millions, I also won't have to put in any effort at all. I'll just have to stand next to him, and I'll look gorgeous.
6. Bill is great friends with Oprah. I could go to an Oprah special. Imagine all the famous people I could sneer at from the front row! AND I could spit on Meg Ryan, which has always been a personal dream...
7. Because I would have access to his completely electronic house, I could mess with it, and force him into having a nervous breakdown. They I could take over the company, and then... well, sky's the limit, really.
8. I could maybe convince him how crap his OS really is, and exactly why it is that so many people are jumping ship from Vista... then he could see the error of his ways and open his source code, or something crazy like that...
9. I would use Bill's fantastic quantity of resources to advance cloning technology, until we had a breakthrough. Then I would clone a newer and shinier and better Bill Gates, psychologically scar him for life, and then get him to do all sorts of unspeakable things... or have I already?
10. Because I'm a masochist, obviously. And if he proposed, how could I say no? It would just be too hilarious.