When the stars are aligned correctly, it's time to make all kinds of decisions. Choose your course wisely... in the technology age, you never know who's watching...
- Sagittarius: Feeling lucky in love? Maybe an email order bride WAS just what you needed when you placed the order last wednesday - but be circumspect about opening the door over the weekend.
- Capricorn: Tomorrow is NOT the day to watch infomercials. You do NOT need a new set of steak knives OR a BBQ. Your girlfriend has bought you one for Christmas and she'll be devastated if you go ahead and buy one too.
- Aquarius: Try not spilling things on your keyboard at work. The IT people are starting to cotton on. And the disk drive IS FOR DISKS ONLY. NOT PAPERCLIPS.
- Pisces: You will make buttloads of money from your internet ventures... The new I.T. boom has YOUR name on it, baby!
- Aries: I can tell you right now, the size of your manhood WILL NOT be improved by "simply entering your credit card details here". And when your girlfriend says size doesn't matter, she really means it! She's not like your ex!
- Taurus: Make sure you check that your mobile phone is switched off on Monday BEFORE you and your best friend start bitching loudly about your other best friend. Otherwise, there could be tears, recriminations, and that dirty secret your other best friend knows about you may stop being so secret...
- Gemini: Sleep in. Don't do any work! You deserve it!
- Cancer: Don't pay attention to the GPS in your car. It's just messing with you.
- Leo: A blast from your past is looking for you. Cancel your facebook account, change your name, and get plastic surgery. There's no other way. OR endure the excruciating five minute encounter with this person in Kmart next week. It's your choice.
- Virgo: Get your boyfriend's digital camera NOW. There are pictures on it you need to delete. I have two words for you... PARIS HILTON.
Libra, Scorpio: Are you having feelings of paranoia? You should be. Because you're being watched. It could be the CIA, it could be Roswell calling... scramble those signals and get your tinfoil hat out.
